You First: Why It's OK to Be Selfish


You are unique.

There is only one you in the whole world. Even identical twins can't share every experience, conversation, and relationship that builds upon your genetics to make you, you. As for lash artists, we spend more time serving others, learning about others and paying attention to other people's lives and work, rather than digging deep to understand who we are, what needs we have and spend time with ourselves. This pattern can lead to burnout and dissatisfaction in all areas of work and life. 

I'd rather spend hours scrolling through Instagram, then spend 10 minutes in an empty room. Just me alone with my thoughts, mentally cataloging my day, checking in with myself, asking questions like, "How am I feeling in this present moment?" "Did I achieve what I set out to complete today?" "Did I even set any goals for myself today?" "Am I okay with that?" "What do I want tomorrow to look like?" Trust me; I would much rather turn off my brain, watch TV with a glass of wine in hand, and forget about the day. And believe me, that second scenario has played out many a night. Now, why is that? Does the glass of wine help build any muscle? Does watching that next episode help me make better decisions or raise my intelligence? If the answer is no, why choose the second option at all? 

It's because I default to comfort. And I don't think I'm alone. 

It's easier to scroll than it is to work. It's more comfortable to sit on the sidelines than it is to play the game. It's more comfortable to stay silent than it is to speak up. It's easier to walk away from a friendship than to be the first to apologize. 


Are you ready to dive into the beautiful mess that life can be?

Take a moment for yourself right now. Close your eyes. Take a few deep breaths, in through the nose for a count of 3 and out the mouth for a count of 3. With each breath out, notice the noise around you subsiding. After your few deep breaths, ask yourself, "How am I feeling?" Then just listen... If the answer is I don't know, ask yourself one more time. If you still got nothing then wait a few hours and try again. If you do get an answer, then ask yourself, "Why?" Why are you happy? Why are you good? Why are you upset? Then listen.

Doing this exercise at least once a day not only helps calm you as a mini meditation practice, but it also allows you to get to know yourself more. You'll begin to raise your awareness of your needs and desires which will help you to adjust things in your day to meet those needs. You will also start to be more expressive. The more we understand our feelings and motivations, the more we will be able to express those feelings to others before unmet expectations form, or feelings get hurt.

Taking care of yourself is not selfish, it's necessary.

What's next? 7 Ways Self-Reflection and Introspection Lead to a Happier Life


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